Fantasy of the Day

August 24, 2010 at 2:31 pm (Mental illness)

So here’s the thing.

Publisher B has had one of my books for fifteen months (the one that keeps getting nearly published), and another book for nine months.

Every three months I send them a gentle reminder of my existence via email, and they’ve always been prompt in getting back to me with a vague, “We’re REALLY sorry and we’ll get onto that, honest.” Generally within 24 hours.

I sent them the usual email (complexified by the July conference, by my plan to pitch it elsewhere on 4 September, and by some editing I’ve done) on Wednesday 11th of this month – cunningly timing my email to fall immediately after a Tuesday (they have acquisitions meetings every second Tuesday, so in theory they could look at the email and say, “Oh my! That certainly has been a long wait. We could prep that book for next acquisitions meeting, since this is exactly the right time for making such decisions.”)

There’s a fifty-fifty chance that today is that next acquisitions meeting. And they haven’t replied to the email. At all. In 13 days.

Reasons for not replying to the email:

1. A crippling attack of severe deja vu, causing them to think they’ve already replied to the email (over and over again).

2. They swore a collective vow not to reply until they’ve made a decision (my personal favourite) – which will happen today!

3. Publisher B has been overrun by zombies.

It’s also possible my primary contact is sick (possibly due to all the zombies around) and hasn’t read the email yet.

So, in conclusion, my cunning plan to suck them into actually replying is clearly doomed. Cunning plans never work. So it’s time to sharpen the old axe and stock up on canned food.

The zombies. They are here.

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2 Comments

  1. Ann said,

    You forgot the possibility that they have decided they are totally sick of you…… Not that I think thats what happened!

  2. Ben (Crispin) said,

    …Actually, I don’t think she did…

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