A good day

June 2, 2009 at 9:56 am (Mental illness) ()

One down side of being mental is that I feel I’ve lost the knack of being happy – not generally happy, like those good-natured freaks we all hate – but happy sometimes, when I’m doing something I like. Even in those moments, I often have to figure out by a process of deduction that somehow, deep down, despite how I feel, I must be enjoying myself.

Today was not one of those days. Today I actually felt it – felt happy.

It didn’t start all that well – one of my cats was missing since last night, and since she has a brain the size of half a dried pea, I checked the road nearby for her mangled corpse.

I was tired for no reason, and went back to bed after a feeble attempt at writing. Decided not to do various errands today, but to conserve my strength for my bit-o-writing and my single hour of actual work.

Once I woke up and had lunch, I felt much better. It’s rare for me to get to midday without buying and eating chocolate, so things were looking good.

I wrote another chapter of the book I’m currently working on (currently titled ‘Farting my ABCs’ on the theory that it’ll be more marketable than my too-intelligent fantasy books). The chapters are only 500 words, but I’m suddenly within sight of finishing the first draft, and that feels good.

I wrote an email re-re-hassling my main boss (I have several, and most are pathetic at actually paying me) about $420 he owes me (and another $420 he’ll owe me in a few weeks). He phoned to apologise, and to say he’ll put BOTH lots in my account immediately. This was immensely heartening news after watching my bank account dwindle for weeks.

I fudged my way through five hours of writing work (today’s quota), including some pleasant reading through a book that needs a bit of polishing before entering it in the text YA novel award. I used coloured textas in a plot-strands diagram, which was fun. (Mmm…pretty colours.)

When I left for my one hour of real work, the prodigal cat showed up (uninjured and looking innocent).

My work went well – I often have difficulty concentrating, but the student was doing so well I spent most of the lesson looking through her book, re-learning my year 11 equations – and the rest of the lesson genuinely helping.

Then I went and bought fun things in the supermarket, flushed with matrimonial affection (the SO turns 30 this week, and we’re less than 6 months married) – mushrooms, fennel (I used to chew on fennel in high school because there were flourishing plants there and we all went through a fennel phase), other spices, mixed salted nuts, and a variety of fruit. Fresh food is one of the thrills of cooking for more than one person – if I don’t finish it, he probably will. Our fruit bowl is brimming with bananas, mandarins, apples, kiwifruit, and limes.

Beautiful sight, beautiful day.


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